


A Blip in the Reader-Verse

by hedoniist



Category: Captain America (Movies), Defending Jacob (TV 2020), Knives Out (2019), Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: 40's au, Alternate Universe - Arranged Marriage, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Alternate Universe - Flower Shop, Angst, Codependency, Date Auction, Domestic Fluff, Enemies to Lovers, Established Relationship, F/M, Fake/Pretend Relationship, Florists, Getting Together, Meet-Cute, Multiple Genres, Multiverse, Not the healthiest relationship, Politician/Journalist, Politics, Travel, Way too many AUs, You’ll see, every chapter is a new au, idiots to lovers, more tags and pairings to be added!, multiple AUs, politician au, rivals to fwb to lovers
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-02-01
Updated: 2021-02-28
Packaged: 2021-03-11 23:34:49
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 6
Words: 16,192
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29125788
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/hedoniist/pseuds/hedoniist
Summary: A minor mistake causes a conflict within the multiverse that only you are able to fix.
Relationships: Andy Barber/You, Ransom Drysdale/Reader, Steve Rogers/Reader
Comments: 13
Kudos: 43





	1. Beginnings and Endings

Nothing had been the same since the Snap.

Unsurprisingly, watching half of your friends and teammates dissolve into no more than desaturated soot took an astounding toll in every single aspect of your life, but more than anything, in your love life.

Despite having some of your teammates left in the aftermath, you found yourself growing more and more anchored to Steve, and him with you. Although you began dating around a year before the Snap, the heavy loss that the both of you faced seem to launch you straight into the abyss of codependency.

Deep down, you knew that this wasn’t healthy for you. You’d be told millions of times by your remaining family and friends that no one should ever be as attached to anyone or anything as you were to Steve. He was your drug of choice, and you were reduced down to an addict. 

You grew frustrated with those who challenged the nature of your relationship. It boiled down to the way that you felt that no one could truly understand the pain and guilt that the two of you constantly were doused in. Yet, at the same time, nothing could take your pain away and distract you from the distressing feelings more than Steve could. 

You knew that if something were ever to happen to him, you’d be absolutely destroyed. You weren’t sure how you’d be able to go on through life without the super soldier by your side. Yet, this feeling was far from exclusive. 

A multitude of nights had been spent in the dark, on opposite sides of the sofa in the living room of your apartment, silently listening to Steve vent, or allowing yourself to divulge your feelings yourself over the tragedy, your deepest fears, and anything else that was on your mind. 

You were more than aware that Steve was just as afraid of losing you as you were of losing him. 

That’s why you’d been so shocked when he offered to return the Infinity Stones sometime after Carol’s second snap.

You stood in the large field behind the Compound with knots tying and untying themselves in your stomach. You genuinely had an awful feeling about what was bound to occur, and you just weren't sure exactly why, it was just a gut feeling.

Coming up beside you, Sam looked around the field, observing the small platform, along with Steve as he chatted with Bruce and Tony, who were putting the final touches on the time machine. 

“You okay? You’re chewing your lip like it’s an overcooked steak, or something,” he chuckled, clearly trying to lighten the mood. 

“I don't know, Sam. I just don’t feel right about this,” you said softly, turning to look at him. 

“It’s alright to be nervous, Y/N. Hell, I’m nervous too! But if it makes you feel any better, he’ll be back in like, 30 seconds, with not even a scratch on his body. And maybe it’ll do you guys some good to have some away time. I heard a certain couple became surgically attached at the hip while I was gone,” he gave you a little smirk.

“Ha ha,” you said drily, actually a bit more annoyed at the topic than you tried to let on. “Promise me he’s gonna be okay?” You asked, looking deep into Sam’s eyes, trying to draw out as much truth as possible.

“I promise. He’s coming over now, so try not to act like you’re on the brink of a heart attack,” he stepped aside, then received a big hug from his friend, before Steve moved on to bid you a farewell. 

You sighed contentedly as you were wrapped in his warm and familiar embrace. The comfort of the hug alone had already calmed you down more than you could’ve ever expected. 

“Why do you have to go?” You whispered sadly into his collarbone. 

“I just do. But I’ll be back before you even realize I’m gone, okay?” He brought a hand up to your hair, and stroked it in what you’d learned was somewhat of a nervous tick. You simply nodded at the question, too upset with the situation to form the right words. 

“I love you,” was all you could come up with. 

“I love you too. Don’t do anything I wouldn’t do while I’m gone.” He stepped away from you somewhat so he could get a good, final look at you. 

“Come on, Rogers. Don’t you have some diamonds you’re supposed to be returning to the jewler right now?” Tony asked jokingly. You gave him a sour face, but acknowledged that it was time for him to go. 

With that, all you were able to do was stand back and watch. But after a moment, Steve’s returning point had passed. Then, a minute had passed. That minute turned to five. And your worst nightmare had suddenly become your reality. 

\----

Returning the stones had gone well, at first. Until it didn’t. Suddenly, Steve was in Stark Tower in 2012, Pym Particles smashed unceremoniously on the ground after falling several floors in the midst of a tussle with himself. 

Steve couldn’t think of any worse scenario. Well, maybe if he hadn’t already returned all but the stone. But that didn’t even matter to him at the moment, he was permanently stuck in the past, and had probably created all sorts of time paradoxes.

Despite his own personal conflicts, he still had one task left, and he wasn’t going to risk a whole universe plunging into their darkest timeline due to a major panic on his part. After escaping the grasp of himself from the past, he managed to slip out of the building in one piece, before wandering the battered streets of New York in an attempt to find the Sanctum.

When Steve arrived at the Sanctum, the door had opened right up for him, as if he’d been expected all this time, and he was greeted by none other than the Ancient One. 

“Captain Rogers,” she greeted, nodding, “I’m assuming you have something for me?” 

Steve nodded, then handed her the briefcase. She opened it, then gladly put the Time Stone back in it’s proper home. 

“Ancient One, I need you to help me with something. Is there any way at all that you’d be able to send me back home?” 

“Why can’t you get back yourself?” She questioned.

“Well, I kind of can’t. All the particles I used to get here are kind of... Gone.” He sighed, cringing internally at his own irresponsibility. 

The Ancient One sighed, and shook her head, “I can do my best, but I can’t guarantee you’ll get back home. I can help you send some sort of SOS to your friends, and I can send you to a new reality, but I can’t promise you’ll end up exactly where you want to be.”

“But we have to try something.” He added helplessly, gaining a nod from the woman standing across from him. 

“You’re right. I think I have an idea of what we need to do.”


	2. White Picket Fence

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> You learn a bit more about the situation at hand, and gain a sliver of hope for the future.

> “Love isn’t something that we invented. It’s observable. Powerful. It has to mean something. Maybe it means something more, something we can’t yet understand. Maybe it’s some evidence, some artifact of a higher dimension that we can’t consciously perceive.  
>  Love is the one thing that we’re capable of perceiving that transcends dimensions of time and space.” - Brand, Interstellar.  
> 

_A breeze blew by idly, shaking the flowers that surrounded you in the field just slightly. You seemed to be lost in your own head, relaxing on your back and basking in the serenity of watching the sunrise. The soft crunch of footsteps approaching alerted you of someone else’s presence, and you moved your gaze to follow the sound._

_You were shocked at the vision of your lover, although he seemed to be a frequent subject of your thoughts and dreams these days. Still, you gasped out, “Steve?”_

_“Y/N,” he responded excitedly, nearly sliding in an attempt to sit down next to you._

_“How did you find me here?” your brows furrowed as you looked at the man, something a bit off about his presence._

_“You know that I’d find you anywhere,” he told you, looking over at you as you shook your head, and turned your away from him._

_“Then why did you leave?” You asked, biting back bitter tears. “You promised me that you’d never leave,” you muttered with a wobble in your voice._

_He reached a calloused hand out to your face, and gently turned it back towards him. “I’m so sorry. I made a really big mistake, an-and now I can’t get back. I’m gonna try to find you, but you have to help me.”_

_“You’re just my brain telling me what I want to hear,” you whimpered, sitting up._

_“No Y/N, it’s me. Really me. It’s so hard to explain, but I messed up really bad. I need you to try to find me too. But I don’t even know if we’re in the same universe anymore.”_

_You gave Steve a strange look at this point, wiping your face with the back of your hand and huffing softly. This did seem a bit far fetched for your subconscious to conjure up on its own._

_A loud and sharp sound interrupted your thoughts, and in an instant, the field of flowers began to fade into obscurity, daffodils and pink tulips turning to nothing more than smudges of pastels against a similarly smudged pale sunrise._

_Yet through the dissolving of the dream, and the distorted noise of what you could only assume was your alarm clock, Steve remained. He grabbed your hand and squeezed it tightly. “I just want to be with you again. Please,” he paused, “bring me back home.” He begged, “back to you,” he pleaded before vanishing as well._

—

You woke up in a pool of your own sweat, your phone’s alarm ringing obnoxiously, as you used one hand to turn it off, and another to dry the steady stream of tears that had escaped your eyes at some point during your rest. 

You had to admit, that was a rather bizarre dream. You’d had your fair share of dreams about Steve since his departure, yet none as vivid as this. Although it was just a dream, it felt like something more. A message, even. You grabbed your phone, and rushed to type in a recap of the event into your notes app, before rubbing the rest of the sleep out of your eyes, and heading out to the kitchen of the Compound to find someone else to confide in. 

Lo and behold, Banner stood in the kitchen steeping a cup of green tea.

“Morning, Y/N. How’d you sleep?” He asked, taking a sip of the drink, before taking a seat at the dining table. 

You chuckled softly to yourself, and approached the Nespresso machine, “That’s a great question. I guess I slept fine, but Steve was there.”

“Again?” Bruce questioned, setting down his mug. 

“Yeah, but it was kind of different. He basically told me that he was stuck and needed me to help him,” you popped a pod into the machine, then slid your own mug under the spout. 

“That is different,” Bruce agreed. “What do you think is going on in that brain of yours?” 

“No idea. It was just so weird, because he told me that he thinks he’s in a completely different universe. Uh, he was just being vague about some mistake he’d made.”

“Hmm,” Bruce grumbled pensively while the sound of your coffee pouring also filled your ears “What do you think happened? Weird dream, or meaningful dream?”

You shrugged hopelessly, then looked down at the floor as Natasha entered the room. “Morning, assholes,” she greeted, shuffling over to where you were standing by the counter, and giving you a classic Nat half hug upon seeing your bloodshot eyes, indicating another tumultuous night. “How’re you holding up, babe?” 

You simply shrugged again in response, grabbing your now filled mug, and setting it down on the counter. 

“She had another dream about him,” Bruce informed Nat. 

“You poor thing,” she said genuinely, despite her words’ sarcastic nature. As you sat down at the counter seats, Nat began to make her own drink. “I know you guys were close, but it might be time to let go. You need closure, and maybe allowing yourself to grieve will help you to not dream about him so often.”

You stared down into the dark liquid, and frowned as you saw a hint of your unkempt reflection. “Yeah, you’re right. But I’m worried. What he was saying in my dream was basically a cry for help. I know, it could just be me projecting, but it just felt so real…” your voice trailed off, and you glanced up to see Bruce and Natasha sharing a concerned look. 

“You guys think I’m crazy don’t you? Great. Fine. I’m gonna go train,” You muttered, grabbing your mugs handle and slipping out of your seat before leaving the kitchen. You couldn’t stand being judged in that moment. Was a little support from your friends too much to ask for?

——

Aware that your teammates didn’t believe the weight of your dreams, you seeked out Wanda, and practically begged her to read your memories and relay them back to the team as a way to gain another witness, and possibly get Steve the help that he might need. 

If Steve was truly trapped in another universe, perhaps the scientists on the team could create technology that could help bring him back. 

As you’d expected, Wanda giving her testimony on what she’d seen in your subconscious to your teammates had helped your case significantly. Although a bit hesitant, Tony and Bruce were desperate to get Steve back, and if it meant going on a wild goose chase, they were open to taking that risk. 

Sooner than later, a small watch was created that seemed to be able to harbor the ability to jump into different universes throughout the multiverse.

You were sitting in the common room, playing a game of chess with Thor, when the trifecta of Tony, Bruce, and Wanda approached you with a small device that appeared to be some sort of smart watch.

“Y/N, you’re going on a mission,” Tony began. “We have good reason to believe that Steve is in fact, in some other universe somewhere in the multiverse. We have no idea how he contacted you, but if your connection to him is strong enough that he can talk to you in your dreams, there’s not a doubt, well, maybe like three doubts, in my mind that you can find him in a different universe.” The watch was passed into your hand.

“Some things we’ve figured out through a few practice runs is that in these universes, you already kind of technically exist. You may have to try to come up with certain memories on the spot, but for the most part, you should remember what your life is like in that universe as soon as you get there, and fit right in. 

Now, the time that you can stay varies in each universe. For some, it’s a long time. Maybe even years. But in others, you might only be able to stay for a matter of minutes. It really just depends on how time works in their reality. About thirty seconds before you’re automatically sent to a different reality, you’ll get a little vibration on your wrist that’ll tell you it’s time to go.

If you need to leave before that vibration, there’s a setting that allows you to do so. You can also come back to this specific universe anytime you need to, but we’re under the impression that it’ll take less of an overall toll on you if you just go straight from one universe to the next.” Bruce added.

“Remember, your mission is to find Steve and bring him back, okay? There are infinite amounts of universes out there, so there are infinite versions of Steve you might come across. Please don’t bring whoever else you might fall in love with back here,” Wanda teased. “We don’t need any more trouble with the time and universe cops.”

You chuckled stiffly, but were trying to really absorb the information you’d just been loaded with. 

“You can leave whenever you’re ready. Right now, tonight, a week. Whenever, okay?” Bruce told you, and you simply nodded. “Alright. Safe travels, okay?” 

“Yeah. Thank you guys, seriously.” 

“You think we’re doing this for you? We want our Capsicle back!” Tony teased. You shook your head fondly, then exited the room, going to your bedroom for some peace and quiet, and to attempt to process everything you’d just heard.

You wrapped the watch band across your wrist, then scrolled up and down the interface, surprised at everything it could do. Yet, before you could even say ‘wow,’ the world seemed to fade to black.

——

When you opened your eyes, you were standing in the same field outside of the compound that you’d been standing in just a few days prior, reliving the final moments you’d shared with Steve.

Except, Steve wasn’t the one standing on the platform. In fact, Steve was standing next to you, his hand squeezing yours in the comforting manner that you’d grown to know over the past six years. The both of you watched Thor wave a friendly goodbye, then disappear into thin air. 

You were at a loss for words. It felt like a do-over more than anything else, but you tried not to get ahead of yourself and mess anything else in the universe up, in an attempt not to cause another butterfly effect.. 

“This is all finally gonna be over,” Steve said, pulling his hand away from yours, so he could wrap his arm around you tightly. “All of this pain and suffering, all of the stress from those Goddamn stones.”

You nodded wordlessly, in a bit of shock from seeing the man that appeared to be your Steve, and feeling his comforting touch after what had felt like a lifetime without it.

“Maybe we can finally start over. Move into the suburbs, have a few kids, the whole white picket fence,” he sighed softly, imagining an ideal future with you beside him. 

You nodded, barely being able to think with the overstimulation of being in Steve’s presence. All you could do was inhale deeply into Steve’s chest, and ignore the soft vibration on your wrist, alerting you of your departure. “I love you Steve,” was all you could muster as you mumbled into his chest.

“Let’s go home.”


	3. Someone in the Crowd

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In your expedition through the multiverse, you find yourself in the crowd of a war bond show.

Steve sat up abruptly, breathing heavily and heart racing from the vaguely distressing experience of being in someone else’s dream. And to top that off, the stakes of being in the dream were extremely high. If he couldn’t contact you and convince you that something was off, he could be stuck here, in the wrong universe, forever.

Steve rolled over and sighed, only to be met with the curious expression of the Ancient One, and nearly jumping out of his skin. 

“Did it work?” She questioned, and Steve wordlessly nodded while anxiously cracking his knuckles.

“So now we wait?” He asked, turning his body around so his feet were planted firmly on the floor. Feeling the ground against him gave him a slight sense of comfort, knowing that he was back in the real world.

“You and I cannot take that risk. I’m going to try to send your consciousness into another universe, and maybe, just maybe, you’ll find your way home. If not, then… I’m not sure what else there is to do.”

“It’ll work though, right?” Steve looked up at her through furrowed brows.

“We can only hope so.”

——

Before your eyes even opened, you noticed the all-encompassing raket of a crowd clapping and hollering for… Captain America?

You opened your eyes and glanced around at your surroundings. If you were sure of one thing, it was that you weren’t in a time that was even somewhat close to yours. That quickly became clear to you as you observed the people sitting around you, and the astoundingly monochrome clothing of those around you. 

You looked down at yourself, and observed your own time period appropriate outfit, your knee-length flowered dress fell nicely against your body, but the shoulder pads weighing on your collarbone kind of made you feel like a football player. You also quickly caught onto the fact that your watch seemed to turn itself into a pendant on your neck. You then glanced up at the stage, and noticed your alarming proximity to it. 

As the curtains on the stage opened, a profound silence fell across the audience. You looked up at the platform expectantly, and you were not disappointed when your boyfriend of many years popped out.

Except, he seemed much more jovial. The dark circles under his eyes weren’t so dark, and he seemed to have a lightness in his step as he pounced around the stage. In the midst of your ogling, the woman next to you leaned over and set a hand over your knee. 

“Didn’t I tell you he was gonna be cute?” she whispered in your ear. At the sound of her voice, you felt a wave of recollection surge over you.

This was your friend Aaliyah, just like your closest childhood friend back in your own reality, who’d dragged you out to this war-bond-promotion thing to see her man crush of the week. 

“He’s really dreamy,” you concurred, not taking your eyes off of the man. 

“So you’re not mad at me for bringing you out here anymore?” She asked, an air of teasing in her voice.

“Shh!” a voice from somewhere above you hissed down at the two of you.

The both of you rolled your eyes, then you looked over to Aaliyah and shared a knowing look with her. 

You looked back at the stage, and watched the routine play out, giggling to yourself at times. The whole show had been at least 10 times funnier, now knowing Steve, even if this wasn’t exactly your Steve. 

In the midst of a giggling fit, Steve glanced down at you, and flashed you a pearly grin. Despite seeing that beautiful smile millions of times, you couldn’t help but to slightly swoon, and look over at Aaliyah excitedly.

She gaped her mouth open at you, and pointed at you with a brow furrowed in confusion, ‘You?’ she mouthed. You responded by pointing at yourself with an equally shocked expression, and mouthing, ‘Me?’

It seemed like the show was over after that, and the lights in the room slowly rose back to their original colors. 

“Holy shit!” Aaliyah squealed, grabbing your arm. “Did Captain fucking America smile at you?”

“If you saw what I saw, then yes!” You grabbed her opposite arm, “we have to celebrate this somehow, right? I think this deserves celebrating.”

You were honestly surprising yourself with the words coming out of your mouth. Part of you knew that Steve looking at you was a regular occurrence that you were used to, but the part of you that actually lived in this universe’s feelings must’ve been strong enough to override even the most logical part of your brain.

“Uh, hell yeah it deserves celebrating. Let’s go!” The two of you stood up, and you straightened out your dress a bit before squeezing through the aisle of chairs, and heading out of the concert hall. 

Leaving the hall turned out to be more of a hassle than you’d initially expected. The lobby towards the exit was packed like a can of sardines, and you and Aaliyah seemed to be standing around for an excruciatingly long period of time.

During this period of time, you zoned out a bit, only half-listening to Aaliyah drone on about some new John Ford movie. 

In this downtime, you decided to ask yourself why you hadn’t left this universe yet, since this was so clearly not the one you belonged in, and not the reality your Steve was in. You came to the conclusion that your morbid curiosity of what may happen next in this reality was more than enough to motivate you not to leave. Besides, who knows? Maybe you could learn a lesson about yourself, or some other corny thing like that.

Lost in your own thoughts, you failed to notice the built blonde man draped in a brown trench coat and looking down speed walking straight into you, and sending you stumbling back into your friend’s arms.

He looked down at you with worry in his eyes, and extended a hand out to you quickly. “My gosh, I’m so sorry!” he exclaimed. 

Steve.

Of course, fate had decided to bring you to the man (who technically wasn’t _really_ your man).

You gladly accepted his hand, and let him pull you forward a bit. Your cheeks warmed at the little touch, and you swore you could sense Aaliyah gawking behind you. 

“Again, my apologies…?” You could tell that Steve was leaving an opening for your name.

“Oh, uh, Y/N,” you smirked a bit at him.

“Let me make it up to you, Y/N,” he offered politely, and speaking softly so that he wouldn’t attract too much attention.

“Make up pushing me on accident?” You giggled at this. Steve somehow managed to be a bit of an unsmooth dork in every reality.

“Uh, yeah, I guess. But only if you want me to… make it up to you,” a bit of a rose tinted blush was clearly visual on Steve’s face. 

“I would love that.” 

\----

“The perks of having a circus monkey take you out, is that he knows all of the back entrances and exits,” Steve explained while weaving his way through the building. 

“Is that some sort of saying from the 40’s?” You casually threw out, following behind Steve as the two of you made your way through the back of the concert hall. As soon as you realized the weight of your words, your eyes went wide. 

“What?” Steve asked, looking back at you while the two of you continued your trek.

“Nothing,” your eyes bounced around the room, and you tried to think of something to change the subject to. Luckily for you, you’d arrived at the door, and that was subject change enough. Steve opened the door for you, and held it as you walked through.

You immediately recoiled at the scent of the city. Simply put, it smelled like the Industrial Revolution. Quickly playing it off, you turned your head to look at Steve, and reach out to grab his hand.

“So, where are you planning to take me, Captain?” Steve gladly accepted your hand back, and you happily intertwined your fingers, despite the slight dampness you noticed on his palms. Was The Captain America sweating from nerves from being around you? You’d have to mentally note this to tell Aaliyah later. 

“Well, there’s this diner somewhere around here that I’ve heard is pretty good. You interested?” He glanced over at you, and you pursed your lips as you faked deep thought about the proposition.

“You really know the way straight to a gal’s heart, huh?” 

\----

You had been sitting in a booth across from Steve for what must’ve been hours now. The conversation between the two of you seemed to flow naturally, as if you were longtime friends. In a way, you kind of were, but in another very real way, this was just the beautiful start of something that would blossom more with every second you spent with Steve.

You picked at a napkin, and Steve glanced down at his watch.

“Shit,” he muttered to himself.

“What’s wrong?” you asked, concern clearly present in your tone.

“It’s just really late, and my manager’s gonna be pissed if I miss my flight tomorrow,” Steve sighed sadly, and reached into his pocket for a pen. “I’ll be trading New York for Wisconsin. So exciting, I know, but we gotta get the war bonds somehow,” he chuckled.

“I get it,” you nodded sadly, then noticed Steve scribble something onto a napkin. 

“You know Howard Stark?” he questioned.

“Heard of him,” you nodded slowly.

“Well, he’s working on this new thing. It’s just like a phone, but it comes with you everywhere you go. I have a prototype of it, I think it’s pretty neat,” he slid you the napkin. “This is it’s number. You can call me any time, anywhere, and I’ll pick it up.”

You smiled sadly at Steve, but accepted the napkin, folding it into a neat little triangle, and slipping it into your dress pocket. “Is this goodbye?”

“Just for now,” he stood up from the booth, and you followed suit, before he reached for your hand and laced your fingers with his.

The two of you silently walked out of the diner, hand-in-hand. Steve eventually pulled his palm away from yours, and started for the direction of his hotel. Although, before he could get too far, you scurried over to him, and pressed a quick peck against his cheek, catching him by surprise, “Bye, Steve. I’ll see you soon.”

“Of course. Bye, Y/N,” Steve waved as he departed, and you made your way towards the curb so you could hail a taxi.

A taxi quickly pulled up to you, and slipped into the backseat and muttered your address. The soft vibration against your chest that alerted you that it was time to go, did not go unnoticed by you, and you closed your eyes as you attempted to relax into the rather uncomfortable seat.


	4. Going Once, Going Twice

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> You meet an interesting character while attending a charity auction.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Before anyone asks, I don’t really consider this cheating since it’s just Steve in a different universe. But don’t read this chapter if that won’t sit right with you!  
> I had to Google Translate some French, please don’t hate me if you speak French.

Sounds seemed to be the first thing you noticed as you entered a new universe. This was absolutely no different.

Well, except for the fact that the first sound you noticed was the announcing of your own name.

From the moment your eyes opened, you were met with a blinding yellow light, and the urge to stand up. You glanced over at the table that you’d previously been sat at, and received raised brows from Aaliyah, who’d been sitting at the white, round table across from you, along with a hand gesture that shoo-ed you away.

You timidly walked up to the small and raised platform of a stage, and stood next to a person who vaguely resembled your old boss from your main universe.

“Alright, ladies and gents! Our final lady of the night, well, not a lady of the night, is the gorgeous Y/N L/N! Starting at $1,000, do we have any takers?”

You looked out into the ocean of round tables, and watched a decently handsome man, with dark hair and a beard raise his paddle, “1,500!” he called out.

The man received a death glare from someone else at his table, and looked up at both the stage and you to raise his own paddle. “2,500,” he responded in a bored tone.

After getting over the extreme ego boost that was being bid over, you let yourself take a good look at the second man who’d offered the cash, and,

_Holy shit._

It was Steve, but it definitely wasn’t Steve. 

His hair was slightly darker, he was wearing a cream sweater and long, multicolored scarf that your Steve would never be caught dead in. He held an air of confidence and cockiness that you could see from miles away, and according to his bidding style, he was loaded.

After seeing him, you desperately wanted to find a mirror and find out if your own appearance had changed at all.

“Fine, $4,000,” the bearded man offered, glancing back and forth between you, and this alternate version of Steve.

“$5,000!” A new contestant jeered, this one a rather old man whom you could tell you wanted nothing to do with.

“Old fucking geezer,” the alternate Steve muttered. “$7,000.”

There was a gasp, and a silence throughout the audience. 

“$7,000 for Hugh, going once, going-”

“15,” the bearded man lifted his paddle once again. You glanced over to Aaliyah, whose eyeballs seemed to be bulging out of her head at this. 

“Fuck it, 30,” Hugh sighed.

The bearded man threw his hands up in defeat, and set his paddle all the way down on his table.

“45, final!” The old man called out.

“75,” Hugh glanced around the audience, a rather smug look on his face.

“Oh wow, $75,000 going once, going twice… sold to Mr. Hugh Drysdale! Miss L/N, is there something you’re not telling us about the nature of your date?” The auctioneer passed the microphone to you, and you laughed awkwardly into it.

“Nothing that I know of,” the rest of the crowd seemed to laugh with you at this, but you couldn’t help but feel the growing discomfort in your stomach. 

“Well, I’m sure the folks over at One Mission will be very happy at this sizable donation. Can we get one more cheer for Miss L/N?” You gave a friendly wave before awkwardly stepping off the stage while the people around you clapped.

You’d had a decent idea at this point of what was going on, but you couldn’t quite piece together why this Hugh character had decided to bid so high on someone he’d never even met. You sat back down at your table, and slipped your phone out of your pocket to look at yourself. Yep, same you. 

“Okay, what the hell was that?” Aaliyah asked you, a mixture of confusion and excitement present in her tone.

“Hell if I know,” you sighed, and scratched your neck nervously.

“I mean, I get it, you’re hot. But the price of a luxury vehicle for a date? You’re gonna have to let him finger you at least,” she giggled.

“Shut up,” you groaned at the thought. You were still feeling pretty confused about the fact that the Steve in this universe wasn’t actually Steve at all. You so far, you’d only really met Steves that were well… Steve. 

You internally lamented the situation, until you noticed someone plop down at the open seat at the table, causing you to turn and look at him. 

“This seat taken?” Hugh asked, and you shook your head. “Great, now it is,” he quipped.

“I’ll give you two a moment. I’m gonna go find my own socialite,” Aaliyah bantered, slipping up from her chair and following through on her comment.

“So you must really love those kids you just donated to,” you awkwardly chuckled.

“Oh hell no. Fuck those kids. I just hate losing, and I absolutely was not gonna let those douchebags win,” he looked down at his hands and played with his pinky ring in an extremely bored manner. 

“Oh, okay,” you nodded slowly. This man was a complete 180 to the type of Steve that you were used to. Your Steve was warm and caring, but this man seemed cold and apathetic. Your Steve would gladly lay his life on the line for anyone, and this man didn’t even seem to have the emotional capacity to hold the door for someone else. “So Hugh, what do you plan to do on our date?” You lifted up your glass of champagne and took a little sip.

“Call me Ransom, only the help call me Hugh. We’ll probably just go to Europe or something.”

You nearly spat out your drink at this. In fact, you felt a little carbonation in your nose. Then again, Ransom just spent ¾ of a hundred thousand on a date with you. “Jesus,” you murmured. 

“Think you can head out tomorrow?” 

\----

Waking up in the bedroom of the apartment you seemed to share with Aaliyah taught you two things. One, you could apparently sleep in these universes and not wake up elsewhere, and two, the walls of your apartment were far too thin.

You glanced over at the clock on your bedside table, and noted the time. You had about an hour before you needed to be at the airport. 

You quickly threw a mixture of clothing, a phone charger, a packet of birth control, and some skincare products into a suitcase before heading out to the kitchen to grab a granola bar. You chewed half the bar before hopping into the shower, then tossing on some ugly, but comfortable travelling clothes. 

Maybe you spent a bit too long checking yourself in the mirror that morning with the newfound knowledge that you were now worth at least 75,000 dollars. Frankly, having multiple (attractive) men fight over you was the greatest boost to your pride that you’d ever been given.

Glancing down at your phone after the matter, you realized that you only had a few minutes to order an Uber to pick you up, unless you wanted to be late and miss your flight. 

\----

You had your baggage checked, stumbled through TSA, and showed the screenshot of your plane ticket a boatload of times to a multitude of people before you finally reached the lounge, and found Ransom sitting on a sofa with a glass of whiskey in his hand.

“Why the hell are you dressed like that?” Ransom asked you as you approached, looking up and down at your outfit of a college sweatshirt and loose joggers.

“Because I want to be comfortable, you dick. Do rich people not like being comfortable?” You sat down beside him on the sofa, and slumped into the chair. Who knew travelling throughout the multiverse could be so tiring? “Besides, you have like seven holes in that sweater. I wouldn’t be talking about anyone else’s clothes if I gladly let moths have a four course meal on my things,” you scoffed.

That seemed to shut him up for a bit.

Eventually, your flight number was called, and you, along with the few other first class flyers piled into the plane. 

You sat down next to Ransom in a soft chair that seemed to lower back into some sort of makeshift mattress, and slipped your phone out of your pocket to send your friends a message that you were taking off.

“You excited?” You asked Ransom while he began to slip a pair of Beats onto his head. 

“Yeah, I like Nice,” he nodded, then grabbed his own phone to connect to the headphones.

“So you’ve been there before?” Ransom nodded, clearly trying to ignore you. “Do you have a plan on fun places to take me?” He shrugged.

You got the message, and huffed as you sat back in your seat. Right before takeoff, you received a message back from Aaliyah of a picture of her cat, and that was enough to bring a smile to your face. 

—— 

About 7 hours into your flight, you noticed Ransom picking out a movie to watch, and you found the idea intriguing. 

“What’cha watching?” You asked, leaning over a bit into his space. 

“Nothing,” he said stiffly, and you rolled your eyes.

“Porn?” You joked, glancing up at him to see if it landed or not. It did not. 

“You know what? You’re a lot prettier when you’re quiet.”

You slunk back into your seat at this and turned your head away from Ransom. The words really bit at you, considering that it sounded just like your Steve, and if you squinted enough, it looked like him too. But your Steve would never say something like that to you, right?

For a moment, you twisted the watch on your wrist consideringly, wondering if you should go to the next universe, where you might gain a little more respect from your partner. Yet something told you to wait it out. If this was still, in some convoluted way, Steve, he’d come around, right?

That alone gave you enough reason to stay.

\---- 

You dragged your suitcase into a hotel room much too big for just two people after nearly 12 hours of an extremely awkward flight, and even more awkward cab ride to the hotel. 

After plopping your things down into the bigger bedroom of the hotel, you stretched rather dramatically in hopes of waking up some of the stiff muscles in your body. In the midst of this, Ransom came up behind you, and set a hand on your back, scaring the life out of you. 

“What the hell, Ransom! A knock or a ‘hello’ will do it next time!”

You turned to look at him, and became a bit flustered at his shirtless, short-clad figure. It was silly, because you’d seen Steve naked a million times before, and this was simply Steve in another universe. 

“You coming to the spa with me?” He smirked as you blatantly checked him out. “Okay, yeah. You’re coming with me. I’ll meet you at the front door.”

You spent around an hour at the spa with Ransom, sweating yourself out in the sauna until you were likely majorly dehydrated, soaking in the heated pool until your skin became pruny and wrinkled, and ending the night with a massage that sent you straight to sleep.

Like, deep sleep. When you became even slightly conscious, Ransom was laying you in your pillowy soft bed. As your eyes opened the slightest bit at him, he scoffed and rolled his eyes.

“Pretending to sleep, how cute,” he muttered sarcastically. You’d argue with him, but you were simply too exhausted to do so. In fact, you were convinced you’d just given him a whole monologue about how travelling makes people tired, but the most that had exited your mouth was a tiny squeak. 

You watched Ransom leave the room, before your head collapsed onto your shoulder, and you fell back into a nice rest.

When you awoke, it was not on your own will.

An overly saturated light attacked your eyes from behind your eyelids, and came all at once, snapping you out of your dreamless slumber. When you glanced over at the harsh source, you noticed none other than Ransom by your window, with a hand on the drape.

“Time to wake up. It’s like, 3 PM, by the way,” he huffed before exiting your room, not even allowing you to reply. 

You groaned in annoyance, having an off handed thought about how jet lag was kicking your ass, before rolling out of bed and trying to find something nice to put on.

By the time you left your room, Ransom was standing by the door, aimlessly scrolling on his phone. “You wanna go for a walk?” 

“Sure, I guess. I’m kinda hungry though, so maybe we can stop somewhere first?” 

Ransom shrugged and gave you what seemed like the hint of a smile, and you hurried to put on your shoes before heading out. 

——

The two of you ended up on the patio of some local restaurant, your eyes skimming the menu while Ransom took sips of his complimentary water. 

What seemed to be out of nowhere, a burly man came rushing over to your table, and appeared to be approaching Ransom, as he turned his head to look at the man, then quickly looked away.

The man, who you could only assume to be the owner, clapped Ransom on the back, and in return, Ransom slumped over in embarrassment. 

You were definitely going to enjoy this.

“Où étiez-vous?, Ranny?” _Where have you been?_

“Occupé, Henri.” _Busy, Henri._ Ransom clearly had a dark red blush on his face now, and he glanced at you as if you could offer him some sort of assistance.

“Trop occupé avec la dame?” _Too busy with the lady?_ Henri asked with a smirk.

“No!” 

“Présentez-moi à elle,” _Introduce her to me._

Ransom sighed dramatically, then sat up from hunching, “Y/N, this is Henri. He’s a family friend,” you couldn’t help but notice how pleased Henri seemed, “Henri, this is Y/N, mon rendez-vous,” _My date._

“Nice to meet you, Y/N,” Henri extended a hand out to you and you gladly shook it. He turned back to Ransom, and continued grilling him. “Est-ce votre cavalier ou votre petite amie?” _Is she your date or your girlfriend?_

“Mon rendez-vous!” _My date!_ You don’t think you’d ever seen anyone become this flustered so fast.

“Hey Henri,” you interrupted, feeling a tiny bit left out, “any way that we could order first, then you could come back here and tell me all the embarrassing stories about Ransom you can remember?”

“That sounds fun to me,” he shrugged.

——

During lunch, you’d learned more about Ransom than you ever knew you needed to know. In the midst of it all, you couldn’t help but to think about how different he was compared to your Steve. His parents were extremely wealthy (no surprise there), he went to boarding school in Nice (which explained his ability to speak French), and Ransom was a bit of an art nerd (perhaps some characteristics could transcend universes).

Surprisingly, he was starting to grow on you. Which was why you were far from opposed to his suggestion of going sight-seeing around the town. 

The first stop you took wasn’t too far from the restaurant. A quaint little gift store with tiny knicknacks lining the shelves, and a relentless, old, orange cat who did not seem to want to leave Ransom alone.

“You should pet her, Ran,” you suggested, leaning down to do so yourself.

“First of all, don’t call me that. Second of all, if you pet her once, it’ll literally never stop,” He glanced over at you from where he was standing at a set of tourist-oriented keychains.

“Are you speaking from firsthand experience?” You grinned down at the cat who was now aggressively rubbing its head against your hand.

“Yes. Luis may seem nice, but one second you’re petting his head, and the next, you’re carrying him around the store, the whole time he’s whispering in your ear for you to buy more things.”

You were a bit taken aback at this, for a second concerned that the man you’d impulsively travelled to Europe with had a few screws loose, since he was apparently hearing local cats speak to him. That’s of course, when Ransom broke into laughter. It took you a second before you laughed a bit too.

“That was so weird, man. Don’t do that again,” you lightly punched his shoulder, then went to pick up Luis who was more than happy to be transported around like an infant. 

After buying a nice mug and a postcard to give to Aaliyah once you returned home, and parting with Luis who seemed to feel a bit, you suggested hopping in a cab to visit one of the many art museums Nice had to offer. 

After a bit of bickering in the backseat, the two of you compromised on the Modern and Contemporary Art museum, and you couldn’t help but feel a tiny bit excited.

Around two hours post-arrival at the museum, you realized that, maybe modern art wasn’t exactly your thing. But it certainly was Ransom’s. He rambled on and on about different pieces that seemed completely mundane to you. Who knew that someone could talk for nearly half of an hour about a canvas painted completely one color?

You noted a shift in Ransom’s attitude towards you. It was clear that you were willing to put up with his little antics, and as the day went on, he began to let down more and more of the tough guy persona he’d had up for so long. To your Steve, at least, art was something that made him feel a bit vulnerable, and you figured that Ransom held the same sentiment. This thought made you feel vaguely homesick, and go in for a half-hug from Ransom, who gladly returned it while he shamelessly effused.

It wasn’t the same, but for you, it was good enough.

\----

You very much enjoyed the rest of your day with Ransom, hopping from interesting site to interesting site with him, and sharing a multitude of fond memories that you hoped would stick with you throughout your inter-dimensional travels.

You ended the night with him on the piano bench in the lobby of your hotel. He wordlessly played a Chopin piece while you mindlessly listened. It was a rather relaxing experience, and quite the finale of your day. You had a bit of a nagging feeling that this was the finale of your time in this universe as well.

“Today was really nice,” out of nowhere, Ransom began.

You hummed in agreement, “it was.”

“I guess I shouldn’t have taken you to all my favorite places on day one, but oh well,” he half chuckled to himself, and you pulled back to look up at Ransom.

“You took me to your favorite places? That’s.. Wow. That’s really sweet,” you glanced down at the piano, then back up at Ransom. He gave you a soft smile in return.

This was the moment, right? The silence that followed that was your perfect opportunity to be kissed. Yet, Ransom wasn’t taking it. So you decided to lean forward slightly, and do it yourself. Catching onto what you were getting ready to do, Ransom moved away from you slightly, and shook his head.

“Hey, I don’t really do that,” Ransom looked down at you, and bit the inside of his lip. 

Deep down, you knew that this was just a man who looked like your man rejecting you, but the less rational side of yourself only told you one thing.

Steve was rejecting you.

He was leaving you again, he wouldn’t even kiss you. The thought of it put you somewhere between seeing red, and seeing nothing at all from the tears that were now flooding your vision.

The one thing that had once convinced you to stay, was now begging you to leave. 

You reached down to your watch, and fiddled aggressively with it. Part of you felt bad for leaving a version of yourself to deal with the awkward aftermath of what just occurred, but another part of you just wanted to get the hell away from all of the distressing emotions you were feeling. 

That part of you seemed to be stronger than anything else. You glanced down at your watch, pressed the button on the side that you were told could make you leave, and let nature take its course after feeling the soft vibrations run throughout your arm.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry, reader. I promise she'll have a better time next chapter.


	5. He Loves Me, He Loves Me Not

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A certain florist has sent you a cryptic message that you're left to decode.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for taking so long to update! I wrote about 4k words of another chapter, realized I hated it, then had to restart. Hopefully the next chapter will be up quicker than this one was.

Becoming conscious while standing, with your finger on the trigger of a spray bottle was not the most pleasant experience. You stumbled forward a bit, and held onto the granite counter in front of you as you attempted to pass through a wave of dizziness, glanced down at the ombré succulent you were currently watering, then at your own attire. Green apron, worn jeans, plain shirt, were you working at a Starbucks or something? A Starbucks with plants?

Your head quickly began pulsing, flooding with new memories from the universe you were in all at once. This experience in particular was much more intense than any other recovery of memories you’d had before, and you pondered if it was due to your manual exit of your past reality, rather than letting nature take its course.

In the midst of your discomfort, you swore to yourself that you wouldn’t leave purposely, unless you were in dire need. There was no reason to make your inter-universal travel any more uncomfortable. 

You set down the bottle in your hands, and observed the room you were in. It was certainly a storefront, but definitely not a Starbucks. You seemed to be in a flower shop, based off of the plethora of gardening supplies and plants that were lining rows of tables and shelves on the walls. Glancing out the window, you noted that the sun had already begun to go down, and the shop was becoming darker by the second. 

“I’m gonna head out for the night,” a familiar voice alerted you, interrupting your observation of your surroundings. Steve. Hopefully your Steve, and not some trust fund prick from another universe. “Hey, are you coming to Tony’s game night thing tonight?”

You shrugged, and turned to face Steve wearing a bright green apron, similar to your own, but with a few dark stains near the pockets. “I totally forgot about that, but are you going?” 

“Kinda have to since I skipped last week’s and Tony threatened to fire me,” Steve chuckled.

“Then I’ll go,” you shuffled towards the sink located just past the cash register to pour out the contents of the spray bottle. “I’ll see you there?”

“Yeah! By the way, I left something in the breakroom for you. And thanks for locking up.” Steve more or less bolted after telling you this, and you grew slightly concerned. Was he hiding a bomb back there or something?

Curiosity getting the best of you, you ignored the rest of your closing duties to head back to the breakroom to see exactly what it was that Steve had gotten you and made such a big fuss about. 

Your eyes fell upon a bouquet of flowers, a mis-matched combination of many different petals. The gesture didn’t seem too off to you at all, you recalled that Steve enjoyed making bouquets for all of your coworkers, especially when he had some down time. You’d assumed that this was no different, except for one simple thing.

The bouquet was absolutely hideous. Angry red tulips, light purple lilacs, and freckles of white daisies stared back at you, presenting the opposite of what every design course you’d ever been required to take suggested.

You knew Steve had a good eye, you didn’t need memories from this universe to know that, which is why you were so confused that Steve had thrown together a clusterfuck of random flowers, and gifted it to you. 

Was he trying to send you a message? The rejection from your last reality was still fresh in your mind. Maybe you were being brought to all of these different universes so that the universe could ultimately tell you to leave Steve. The notion of which filled you with concern and dread.

You grabbed the ugly bouquet, and hit the light on your way out of the room. 

You were going to get to the bottom of this.

After closing up shop, you made your way back to your apartment, tossed the bouquet into an empty vase, and as you headed to the bathroom to take a quick shower, were greeted with a lazy wave from the sofa from Aaliyah as she used her other hand to scroll on her phone.

After freshening up and changing out of your work clothes, you strolled back into the kitchen, and observed the bouquet as you added a bit of water and feeder. Setting down the vase on your kitchen table, you squinted at the mess of maroon and lilac. It almost seemed like the flowers were pissed off at you. Oh god, was Steve angry with you?

“Where you heading, hot stuff?” Aaliyah asked, coming up behind you and briefly sending the soul out of your body as she went to grab a slice of bread. 

“Oh my god, you have to stop sneaking up behind me!” you gasped, “I’m going to Tony’s for some game night thing.”

“Fun,” she commented, glancing over at the vase on the table. “Interesting choice there,” she used her head to gesture towards the flowers.

“I didn’t make this. Steve gave it to me before he left today,” you moved to set it down on the center of your dinner table, and your friend continued to eye up the vase. 

“Ooo, what do the flowers mean? All those different flavors and colors...”

“Flavors of flowers? And I have no idea, honestly. With all that red, I think he’s trying to tell me that he hates me and wants me to stay far away from him or else he’ll get a restraining order.”

“Okay, you need to relax. I kinda think he likes you. I mean, I see the way he looks at you when you’re working together. Total heart eyes,” she gave a little smirk, and made a little heart with her fingers.

“I’m sure,” you said drily. “As much as I enjoy you antagonizing me over my coworkers, I have to get going if I don’t wanna be late. I’ll see you later tonight?”

“I’ll be in my room, biting my nails as I anxiously await your return. Should I start writing my wartime love letters for you now or later? Wait, before you go, do you know if Thor will be there?”

“You’re ridiculous. But yes, probably.”

“Tell him I said hi, please?” She stuck her bottom lip out and gave you puppy dog eyes. 

“Of course. You want me to tell him to send you a text at 4 AM asking if you’re awake too?”

“I mean, I certainly have no issue with that,” Aaliyah gave you an overexaggerated wink.

“Okay. Goodbye,” you shook your head in faux disappointment as you left.

\----

When you arrived at Tony’s, Natasha gladly opened the door, and ushered you into the living room where your other coworkers had already settled into a relaxed conversation. You looked around for a spot, and found open seating next to Steve on a beige loveseat.

Your friends gladly welcomed you, and as you sat down next to Steve you swore that you saw a soft blush rise to his cheeks.

“Now that everyone’s here, I’m pleased to announce that the theme of this game night is Jeopardy! I hope you all brought your thinking caps, and studied up on your trivia of… I don’t know. Everything?” Tony began, typing up something on his laptop while he spoke.

“What does the winner get?” Bruce questioned.

“A raise,” silence fell across your teammates for a moment, “that was a joke. The winner gets bragging rights.”

There was a collective groan, and the grimace seemed to turn something on in your brain that forced you to acknowledge how familiar the environment felt to you. It felt like a snapshot of life that was able to bring you back in time before the Snap happened. Jokes amongst the team, a rosy-cheeked and slightly shy Steve by your side, a general sense of contentment throughout the room. Even though you clearly weren’t in your normal setting, the sense of normalcy was extremely comforting, and exactly what you needed after the disaster that was your last universe.

As Tony and Pepper fussed with the computer and their projector, Steve leaned in a bit closer to you as if he was preparing to tell you something.

“What’d you think of the flowers?” He asked with a slight tilt of his head.

You were a bit stumped. Obviously you weren’t going to say that you thought if you stared too long, you’d get a headache, but what if he was trying to tell you something? More specifically, tell you off? Were you going to humiliate yourself if you didn’t catch on? 

“They’re great. Thanks for putting it together. They’re sitting on my kitchen table now,” you gave Steve a soft smile, and his blush went a bit darker.

“Oh, okay. No other thoughts?”

You quirked a brow at this. Maybe you weren’t being paranoid after all, and there actually was a hidden meaning to the bunch. “Should I have other thoughts?”

“Nothing, nothing. Just forget I asked,” Steve quickly leaned away from you, and went on to watch Bucky and Sam as they gossiped about some rude customer.

“Since teamwork makes the dream work, you’re working with the person closest to you. Think of this as a team bonding activity, and try not to get too mad when your partner doesn’t know that Barbie’s boyfriend is named Kevin,” said Pepper, glancing over at Thor.

“Okay, that was once, and I knew it was Ken. I just got distracted and a little confused,” defended Thor. 

As the rest of the room giggled, but you couldn’t help but notice how stiffly Steve seemed to be sitting next to you. His slightly nervous and uncomfortable demeanor around you was really throwing you off and somewhat concerning you, especially since the two of you were now partners for the game.

It felt off, not just because you were used to your Steve being comfortable around you, but because you sensed that even in this world, you and Steve were typically much more relaxed around each other.

“Everyone calm down, we’re doing rock, paper, scissors to see who gets to go first,” Tony announced, and those in the room quickly began to shake fists at each other until it was down to you and Clint. Clint threw out a closed fist, and you an open one, leading him to win and pick the first topic of Science.

The match went on for a bit, the team of you and Steve with the highest number of points before the next round began. Steve slowly became a bit more relaxed with you, and he gestured for you to make the next move.

“I’ll take ‘Signs and Symbols for 800,” you said while chewing a cracker and cheese you’d received from the charcuterie board on the coffee table in front of you.

Tony clicked on the question, then read it aloud. “What is the meaning of a pink Hydrangea flower? Oh come on, this is way too easy. We work at a flower shop for god's sake,” he huffed.

You were actually quite lost, and you glanced over at Steve to see if he would be of any assistance. “Uh,” you began, “let me consult with my partner.” 

Steve gave you a wide eye look with furrowed brows, “do you really not know?” 

You nodded helplessly at him. 

“Oh wow, well, our answer is ‘what is heartfelt feelings.’” He answered for you. “How don’t you know that?”

“I’m not a walking flower encyclopedia!” 

“You should be. What happens if a customer asks you what something means?”

“I have Google on my phone for a reason.”

“What if you don’t have your phone?”

“Steve, you know I hate hypotheticals. I usually just lie,” you snickered. Steve appeared to be truly bewildered. It couldn’t all be over the fact that you didn’t know flower symbolism off the top of your head.

The tension that had slowly flowed away throughout the night had made a swift return. You lost your footing with Steve, and unfortunately, your lack of synchronicity cost you a win at the game.

You really couldn't care less, you were much more busy trying to analyze Steve’s strange and uneasy behavior towards you. The perplexing and tense situation at hand made you want to get home as soon as possible, and lie in bed, overthinking every single interaction you’d had with the man.

As soon as the opportunity lent itself, you said your pleasantries and goodbyes, then practically sped back home.

While passing the kitchen on your way to your room, you caught a glimpse of the vase of cryptic flowers. You kept the image in your mind's eye as you changed into pajamas, slipped into bed, and drifted off into a dreamless sleep.

Your next day as an employee at Falcon Florals went pretty well. You discovered that you were rather proficient at your job, and considering that Steve was the only employee by your side, you managed to avoid him decently well (it certainly helped that he seemed to be avoiding you with equal, if not, more vigor). 

After you finished up a form on your latest shipment of orchids, you noticed an older woman eyeing you by the make-your-own bouquet area. You looked from your left and to your right, just to make sure she wasn’t seeing something that you weren’t before you approached her. 

“Anything I can help you with?” You questioned, putting on your best customer service voice. 

“Oh, yes, dear! My daughter sent me on a wild goose chase to pick up about a billion and a half items for her before her event tonight,” she gestured to a list in her hand. “I would ask the young man for help, but you have such a trustworthy face.” You chuckled, and stole a peek at Steve, who was sweeping the floor a few feet away in an attempt to seem busy.

“I was just wondering if you could give me advice for a bouquet? It can all be one type flower, I just want it to be pretty and meaningful,” she asked hopefully and you nodded.

“Of course, that’s the only reason why I’m here.”

“What do you think about this one?” the older woman questioned, pointing at a white, curled flower as she spoke.

You rose to the balls of your feet, and peered over the surrounding flowers to get a better look, “it’s really pretty. What’d you say the occasion is?” The longer you looked at the flower, the longer it began to appear familiar. You could’ve sworn that that was in the bouquet Steve gave you. Your eyes flitted to the label under its bucket that read ‘Gardenia’ in your handwriting.

“It’s just a little engagement gift for her partner. I think it’s a gardenia? She told me it represents love or something? Secret love? Trust? Purity? I’m not sure. They look like wedding flowers, right?” 

You could practically feel Steve’s eyes boring into you at this point, and you were completely aware that he was shamelessly eavesdropping on you two. “Yeah, that sounds right,” you agreed enthusiastically. You honestly had no idea what a gardenia’s symbolism was. There were just too many flowers in the store to keep up with. 

“Well, I guess I’ll take like, six stems of these?” She offered. 

“If you go wait for me at the counter, I’ll get it ready for you,” with that, she was off, and you were once again alone with your thoughts.

Steve listening that hard had to mean something, right? Especially since you were almost completely sure that he had gifted you some in his hideous bouquet. Maybe you’d been reading this wrong the whole time. 

The flowers absolutely had a double meaning, just not the meaning you’d initially anticipated.

\----

After clocking out of one of the most cumbersome shifts of your life, you rushed home and got straight to work. You captured the clear vase on your kitchen table, and brought it into your room, shutting the heavy door behind you before setting the glass softly on your desk.

You whipped out your laptop, and opened the app on your phone that occasionally helped you identify the different kinds of flowers you were working with, and got straight to work.

You pulled a long stemmed rose out of the vase, and noted its deep red color, darker than the classic red rose, so much so that it nearly had hints of brown. Due to this, you identified that it was burgundy, and noted it on a Google Document. You set the flower back down, and traded it for a waxy red flower, that your phone identified as an amaryllis. 

You maintained this routine for the next nine flowers in the bunch, ultimately pinpointing each type, and variation of flower within your bouquet. With your newfound knowledge of the forms of flowers you had in your possession, it was now time for you to figure out their meaning.

You took a deep breath, and attempted to calm your racing mind. You just weren’t sure how you could go on if what Steve was trying to tell you through these flowers was that he actually couldn’t stand to be around you any longer. 

Typing ‘red amaryllis symbolism’ into your search engine, you braced yourself for what may come next, but were pleasantly surprised when you saw the first result. 

_“Red amaryllis is the most classic variant of this bloom. It symbolizes love, attraction, and passion.”_

You nearly gasped aloud at this revelation. You shouldn’t have been so surprised that the flowers were a confession of love, considering that you and Steve were practically bound at the hip and nearly inseparable back home.

An irrational part of you wondered if Steve had just gotten it wrong. Perhaps he picked the wrong flower, and you were reading this all wrong. You still needed a bit more confirmation that he was confessing to you that he had feelings for you.

You pressed delete several times on your keyboard, switching ‘red amaryllis’ for ‘heather lavender.’

_“Regardless of the shade, it means admiration. If an individual admires someone, it was customary to show his admiration through the gift of flowers, specifically heather.”_

Steve was really committed to the bit. But maybe he just got two flowers wrong? Deep down, you knew that Steve was a very passionate and dedicated man, and could probably list out every kind of flower, its meaning, and the perfect occasion for it in his sleep. However, you just wanted to be completely sure. Three times the charm, right?

You searched for the meaning of the light pink peonies dotted in the bunch, and were rather pleased with what you found.

_“Generally, peony flowers symbolize lots of beautiful meanings. Depending on the color or variety, peonies represent romance, compassion, good luck, prosperity, happy marriage, and even bashfulness”_

This was no fluke. Steve was confessing his feelings for you, and you’d made things awkward by not noticing, and not reciprocating. You knew just how terrible of a feeling that was, and you refused to let the man of you dreams wallow in that.

It was a bit late now, but you knew that Steve was more likely than not, back at his apartment. You swiped the vase with his flowers off of your mahogany desk, slipped your keys into your pocket, then went off to go find him.

Utilizing your general memory of Steve’s home from one of his hostings of a team bonding night, you found his building, and finessed your way inside. Knocking on door 36C with one hand, cradling the vase with another, and hoping for the best, you shifted back and forth on your feet while you waited for the door to open.

A blonde woman with a slight curl in her hair and kind eyes greeted you. “Can I help you?” she asked with a tilt of her head, and lack of malice in her voice. You immediately recalled that this was none other than Sharon Carter, and if this really was Steve’s apartment, you’d read everything completely wrong.

Your shoulders slumped a bit, but you maintained just a cell of hope. You didn’t drive all this way to not at least attempt to reconcile the friendship between you and Steve. “Uh, is Steve here?”

“He’s next door, to the left.”

A dam of relief flooded over you. You let out a breath that you weren’t even aware that you were holding. “Oh, okay, thanks! And, uh, sorry for interrupting your night,” you gave a bit too big of a grin, before heading off to the next door. 

You rapped your knuckles against the wood grain of his door, and after a minute, a rather flustered Steve Rogers appeared behind his now opened door,

“Hi,” you began. “You busy?”

“No, not at all. Come on in,” he stepped back, and gestured for you to enter his apartment. You briefly gazed around at the simplistic layout, a black monochromatic theme throughout the home that seemed to contrast with the occasional overgrown green plant. A sitcom played as a quiet mumble in the background of the room. 

Steve glanced at the vase in your hand, then back up to your face. “What brings you here tonight?” 

“I just wanted to chat with you,” you shrugged, moving the vase over your chest so you could hug it.

“We couldn’t text?”

“I wanted to have this conversation face-to-face,” you couldn’t help but notice that Steve’s face was getting redder by the moment. 

“Okay…?”

“I just wanted to tell you how much I like the bouquet. Like, a lot. I wasn’t completely sold at first, but then I looked into it, and now I wanna keep it forever. I guess you could say that my relationship to the bouquet was like a burgundy rose.” 

“Unrealized love?” He asked with a tilt to his head. “You knew what they meant the whole time?” 

“Definitely not. But I eventually figured out that you were trying to tell me something with these, and it was only fair of me to try to figure out what exactly that was,” you set the vase down on the ground, and set a hand on Steve’s bicep.

“I guess I should just say it, but I think you already kind of know. I think you’re really great, Y/N. I’d love it if we went out sometime. Just the two of us,” Steve offered with a hopeful look.

“Really? I came over here to tell you the same,” you squeezed his arm lightly, and ignored the faint vibrations from your watch. 

Seriously, universe? You’re having your Hallmark moment!

“Well, I’m free tomorrow night. Maybe you and I can do something then?”

“That works perfectly for me,” you gave a soft smile, knowing you’d never be able to see this date yourself. 

The most you could do was hope that you were setting up this version of yourself for success.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Since I never really say what was in the bouquet all at once, here's what was in it & what it represents:  
>  _burgundy roses_ (love that is yet to be realized), _red tulips_ (true love/declaration of love), _red amaryllis_ (passion), _daisy_ (loyal love), _gardenia_ (secret love), _heather lavender_ (beauty & admiration), _hydrangea_ (pink - heartfelt feelings, purple - a desire to get to know someone)


	6. Extra! Extra! Read All About It!

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> You kept your friends close, and your enemy even closer.

**Is Andy Barber Really the Best for Our Nation’s Future?**

**_Opinion_ **

**by Y/N L/N**

**Feb 7, 2021, 4:36 PM ET**

**After tonight’s debate, the question that’s begged is if Andrew Barber is truly fit to run our country. Although he’s clearly a front runner for his party’s nomination, he’s shown time and time again that he may actually be our weakest candidate.**

**His weaknesses were highlighted during the debate, with his dodged questions and vague answers. At this point in time, it’s hard to tell if Barber has a platform at all.**

**With Super Tuesday just around the corner, I ask you to reevaluate your support for Barber. Though a charming candidate, it seems that that’s all he has, his charm. His policies are weak, and borderline impossible, and he certainly isn’t the right person to become the most powerful man in the world.**

—-  
When you became conscious, you were no better than unconscious. Your eyes opened and were immediately met with a harshness from the sun peeking through a window. You shifted away from the brightness, body sinking into a memory foam mattress while your nude form rubbed against similarly soft sheets. You sleepily rubbed your eyes before they flitted throughout the room you were in. Observing an oddly clean, generic looking area, you’d quickly connected the dots that you were in a hotel room. A rather fancy one at that. 

Soft breathing came from next to you, and as you turned your head a bit more, you were met with the back of a fluffy and dark haired man. You weren’t completely sure, but judging by your history of finding your way to Steve, you’d assumed that it was some alternate form of your partner.

The man in bed next to you yawned, and haphazardly threw an arm in your direction, before rolling over to greet you, “morning sunshine,” he slurred sleepily.

The beard was a bit of a surprise to you. Though you’d begged and begged your Steve to keep it, he often refused for one reason or another. Seeing the man next to you who (what was now much clearer to you) a version of your boyfriend, was a rather pleasant surprise. 

“Morning,” you responded in an equally sleepy manner, ignoring the rhythmic vibration coming from your night stand.

“Mm, you should get that,” he mumbled, pressing a disoriented peck to the side of your head while you reached over to grab your phone, which you could now see was the perpetrator of the vibrations.

“Hello?” you asked into the phone.

“Are you dumb? Or are you fucking stupid?” Aaliyah’s voice scolded through the phone. “Do you know what kind of position you’ve put me in? This is a fucking mess, Y/N. All for some dick? How could you be so careless?! Jesus!”

“What are you talking about?” You glanced over at Andy, and sat up a bit, pulling the crisp blankets over your body in an attempt to retain some form of modesty.

“Don’t play dumb with me. You’re fucking Andy Barber, but you’re writing articles about him like you just watched him kill your dog. You realize that this puts all of us at risk, right? You’re gonna lose your job, I’m gonna lose my job since I decided to edit and publish your shit, and you and I will lose any sort of journalistic integrity we’ve ever had, or will have, for the rest of goddamn time! Seriously, you could’ve had anyone, but Andy Barber? Andrew fucking Barber?” she groaned over the line.

“Uh, I’ll uh, call you back,” you whispered.

“You’re joking right? Are you with him right now?”

“Aaliyah!”

“Oh my god, you’re with him right now. You’re a fucking mess,” she huffed before hanging up.

_Why did the universe have to send you off to such a shitshow?_

You rolled out of bed, and sulked into the bathroom, desperate to find out what was going on. While sitting on the toilet, you scrolled through the wall of notifications; tweets directed at you, messages from confused friends begging you to call them when you had a chance, and even the occasional concerned email. 

You grimaced as you read through each one of them, eventually clicking on the article that many seemed to be referencing, which included a paparazzi photo of you and this Andy Barber character entering a hotel together sometime in the late night to early morning, partnered with an article or two of your own criticizing him. At first, you wondered if he was some sort of celebrity, but what you ultimately found out was much worse. 

He was a politician. A senator who was running to be president.

You screamed into your hands, before tossing your phone aside, and starting a warm shower for yourself. Perhaps the shower could help jog your memory a bit. 

Stepping into the steamy chamber, and letting the water pelt down onto you did do wonders for you, and it gave you a moment of focus. With both your memories from this universe, along with the information you’d been given through your phone, you were able to piece a few aspects of the universe together.

You were a journalist, a popular one at that, Andy was Steve, but not Steve, and also a presidential candidate. Aaliyah was your editor, and a higher-up at the Times, and you were about to have your ass handed to you over an affair. At least Andy wasn’t married.

Your shower must’ve taken longer than you’d expected, as there was a soft knock on the door after some time. 

“Everything okay in there?” a slightly muffled voice asked.

“Yeah. Just peachy. Why aren’t you more worried about this?” you called back.

“I have a good publicist. And campaign manager. I just have a good team,” Andy paused briefly. “When you’re ready, room service is ready.”

\----

Over aggressive mouthfuls of fresh fruit and bitter coffee, you conversed with Andy.

“How are we gonna fix this?” You questioned while setting down your fork.

“Well, it’s simple. We just have to find some kind of spin to this whole story. Maybe you were just interviewing me, or getting a soundbite from me.”

“Why would you agree to get a soundbite from someone who clearly has it out for you?” You set your fork down, and crossed your arms over your white robe clad chest. 

“That’s a good question,” Andy nodded a bit, “a good question for someone else to answer.”

“Why don’t we let your publicist figure out how to play this?”

“I’d say I’m a bit of an expert at this at this point, but I’ll call my team.”

“You do that, I need to assess the damage to my career,” you huffed, moving to sit on the bed so that you could aggressively scroll on your phone in peace.

Andy called someone, and you patiently waited while he chatted with them. 

“Okay, Y/N. We can’t leave through the front, so my guy’s gonna pick us up in the garage. We have like, half an hour,” he tossed his phone aside, then maneuvered himself to get in bed with you, setting both hands down on either side of you, and placing a soft kiss on your lips. He slowly began to inch down your body, untying the belt of your robe as he did so, when you interrupted him.

“What do you think you’re doing, Andrew?”

“We have time.” He looked up at you.

“We are not doing this. What do you think got us into this mess in the first place?” you frowned, moving one of his hands so you could slide away from him. 

“Are you serious?”

“Yes! Why aren’t you taking this seriously! Do you realize that both of our careers are at stake here? I don’t want to lose my job because I’m having an affair with you. You shouldn’t want to lose a shot at office for a woman you’re not even with.”

“Come on, we’ve been doing this for almost a year, and you only have a problem with it now?”

“Yes! The public had no idea before! They’re going batshit now! And the worst part is that I’m the one taking the most heat,” you sighed, and Andy gave you a frown. 

“I’m sorry, Y/N. You know I didn’t want this to happen.”

“It’s kinda too late for sorries now.” 

——

You stepped out of your suite about five minutes after Andy left, suitcase in tow, blocky sunglasses on your face, and a heathered grey peacoat draped over your shoulders. Although you were stressed from the controversy you’d found yourself in, you couldn’t help but feel the buzz of excitement from having to hide from the paparazzi. At the same time, you felt quite bad for this version of yourself.

When you finally got out to the designated Cadillac, you asked for his driver to roll up the partition, like you’d done a million times before, then looked out of the tinted windows. The ride was pretty awkward, considering you were in no mood to talk to Andy, and Andy felt bad about the issues he’d imposed on you from his own carelessness. He set a cautious hand on top of yours, and though you were agitated, it did brighten your mood the slightest bit. 

After what felt like forever, you arrived at his campaign building, and you were ushered into a small, soundproof space, with a large and round pine table in the center of it. Surrounding the table was a very tired looking Aaliyah, and… Tony Stark? 

“How’s everyone’s weekend been?” Tony asked, breaking the ice as you and Andy settled into your seats.

“Are we really doing small talk right now?” Aaliyah deadpanned, “sorry, that was uncalled for.”

“Alright, straight to the elephant in the room then. You two were out spotted, big deal, happens all the time to politicians and their mistresses-“

“I’m not his mistress! You know this, Tony,” you huffed.

“Tony knew and not me?” Aaliyah gasped.

“Well-“ you began. 

“Save it.”

“It was on a very need-to-know basis,” you muttered.

“Back to what I was saying. I suggest that we don’t address it, unless addressed.”

“I don’t know if you’re dense, or what, but that’s the exact opposite of what we need to do. We have to get on top of this story before the story is that you,” Aaliyah gestured at you, “are packing your shit at the Times.”

The door shot open, and quickly closed. A slightly flustered blonde man stumbled through. “Sorry to interrupt,” he began.

Aaliyah rolled her eyes at this notion, muttering a ‘sure you are’ to herself. 

“We just finished polling numbers, and Andy, you’re up?” He projected the screen of his iPad onto a TV in the room, then passed the device over to Andy on his way to sit down.

“Thanks, Vis,” he gave him a curt nod.

“Why would our candidate allegedly hooking up with someone who hates him boost him in the polls?” Tony asked.

“Middle America loves a family man, you know that,” Vision said in a matter of faculty manner. “Andy has had a hard time connecting with that demographic because when they see him, they see an Elitist East-coaster.”

“Hooking up with a hot reporter does not make you a family man,” Aaliyah retorted.

“That brings me to my next point. If you don’t mind, I’d like to add a proposal of my own,” Vision stated, and received a shrug from the rest of the room. “Well, if we need to put a spin on this, the obvious choice is to explain that they’ve been seeing each other the whole time. Under wraps, of course. The photos the paparazzi received are not damning by any means, and look more romantic than sexual, to be quite frank. Y/N wrote those articles to throw the public off her scent, and she didn’t really believe anything she said, and Andy? He’s just a good, all American man who was tired of keeping his relationship under wraps. Everything’s to gain from this plan.”

“Well, I lose my journalistic integrity. That’s a pretty big loss to me. I may never work again,” you rubbed your forehead in a distraught manner.

“You won’t have to worry about working when you’re the First Lady. Think about it, if we can get votes from the swing states, we’ve secured enough electoral votes to have a Barber win. All over a little character rebrand.”

“Excuse me, the First Lady?” You nervously glanced between Vision and Aaliyah while you attempted to pick your jaw up from the floor.

“Well, yes. We can’t exactly get the full ‘family man’ look without Mr. Barber being a real husband.“

“Are we talking, real wedding?” Aaliyah questioned.

“Yes. You just have to be legally bound together for around four years, eight years tops. About twelve would be preferable, but I understand that not everything works out.”

“I don’t object to that,” Andy winked and nudged you a bit.

_What a mess._

“Back to what I was saying, we’ll probably need about a two week PR period before we do a press briefing announcing the engagement. Give or take. During that time, we could have your publicist arrange all sorts of good photo ops for you two.”

“Either way, my career is ruined,” you sighed, and Andy set his hand on your back.

“Sorry, sweetheart.”

“You don’t have to do that. We’re not currently standing in front of 30 cameras.”

“Well, we should prepare for when we _are_ in front of 30 cameras.” 

“Is it though?” Vision interjected, bringing you and Andy back from your aside. “We can just deflect, maybe have a few of your friends make articles about how what you did wasn’t all that bad.”

“Is it not a valid criticism of me that I was sleeping around with the person who I was also slandering?”

“Is it not possible to criticize someone you care about? In fact, helping someone learn how to improve can be very romantic,” Vision shrugged. 

There was a brief silence throughout the bunch while everyone pondered a counter argument. 

“That right there, that kind of insight is why we call you the Vision,” Tony shook his head and proudly clapped the man on his back.

“So it’s settled then? We’re really doing this?” You glanced around at your peers while Aaliyah spoke. “Any objections, love birds?”

Andy shrugged, “I’d be happy to spend the rest of my life with her.”

You, on the other hand, weren’t so sure. 

——

**Barber and his Greatest Critic Break Bread Together on Friday**

** read more **

**Y/N L/N Announces She’s Not Resigning from Senior Position, and That She’s Been Seeing Barber!**

** read more **

**BREAKING! Barber Announces Relationship with Critic Y/N L/N**

** read more **

**Is L/Nber the Ship that Shows us How Relationships Are More Powerful than Politics?**

** read more **

**Our New Favorite Political Power Couple Showed Up Together at a Rally, and We Couldn’t Be More Excited.**

** read more **

**Barber 7 Points Ahead in the Polls, Leaving Loguidice and Kline Trailing Far Behind**

** read more **

**Was Y/N Really in the Wrong?**

**read more **

**“L/Nber” Celebrate Valentine’s Day Together**

** read more **

**These L/Nber House Hunting Photos Are Giving Us Life!**

** read more **

This was your reality for the next two weeks. The news cycle was filled with a plethora of articles about you, some criticizing you, some criticizing Andy, but most, supporting the two of you in your romantic endeavors. Unsurprisingly, the world loved a good story about two attractive people getting together. 

During this period, you didn’t particularly feel like leaving, though the thought had certainly crossed your mind. You just weren’t sure that you wanted to be dealing with those terrible symptoms again in the midst of an already stressful stage of your life. At the same time, it seemed like the universe was not going to be fair with your time in this reality. You were convinced that you were here for the long haul, or at least, until Andy proposed to you. 

Although it was a bit annoying, cameras around every corner, a watchful eye on everything that you or Andy even considered doing, you found yourself growing on Andy. In some ways, he was a bit more intense than Steve, whose personality had mellowed out a bit since the Snap.

This had been the first time in all of your travels where you felt like ‘Steve’ was the one pursuing you, and in all honesty, it made you feel good. Even if everything the two of you did had an aftertaste of artificiality.

You spent more and more time with him every day, staying together with him in hotels across the country, visiting local businesses with him to get the perfect photo op, and attending galas with donors. It seemed like in every candid photo of Andy, you weren’t too far behind. By the time the day of your proposal arrived, you weren’t even all that opposed to the marriage. 

When the proposal finally arrived, the two of you were sat inside a rather fancy restaurant, finishing up your meal when Andy settled on one knee in front of you, “Y/N,” he began, and you felt the all too familiar tremble of your watch on your wrist. 

You almost had to restrain yourself from exclaiming out loud. It’s not that you didn’t like Andy or anything, he’d genuinely grown on you. In the least cheesy way, it wasn’t him, but you. Being somewhere so unfamiliar for so long had begun to create a cumulative exhaustion that wore a bit more on you every day. Feeling homesick was an understatement.

You brought your hands up to your face, and gasped dramatically, squeezing your eyes shut to see if you could possibly produce a few tears, while mobile cameras and a few professional flashes were directed towards you. A few warm droplets slipped down your face, and for a moment you weren’t even sure how fake they were. It seemed like once they started, they couldn’t stop.

You missed Steve, your Steve, the man you’d fallen in love with. You missed your friends, teammates, and family. You missed the stability of knowing what the world held for you next. 

In the midst of Andy’s proposal, in what should’ve been the happiest moment of your life, all you could focus on was your overwhelming desire to have a sense of normalcy in your life once again. 

——

You woke up in a cold sweat, heart racing in your chest, and shaking your ribcage. You looked up to the ceiling of what you had grown to know was your room in the Compound, your real room, and felt your eyes well up in tears that stung you. 

You sat up, and took as deep of a breath as you could manage, when you noticed Wanda sitting by your bedside.

“Oh good, you’re awake,” she said softly, coming closer to you, offering you a glass of water before sitting at the foot of your bed. 

“Where’s Steve?” you asked, trying to gauge where you were. 

“Honey,” she sighed softly. “I’m so sorry. He’s still missing.”

Your lip trembled as you took a sip. You really were back home. 

“I know you’re hurting, but when you feel a little better, we’re going to Medbay. Banner decided that we should probably keep an eye on your vitals, but you were gone before we even had the chance to get you there.”

You gulped down the water, then set it on your bedside table, “so was that all just a dream or something? Why isn’t Steve back?” you huffed frustratedly.

“I don’t know why he isn’t back, but I don’t think you were dreaming. I was trying to watch your dreams, but I couldn’t read you, or your thoughts at all.”

“Hmm,” you mumbled, throwing your legs over the side of the bed, “let’s go.”

As you settled into the cold, and sterile medical facility you were hooked up to a plethora of monitors, and a cacophony of devices beeped as they read your physical state. 

You tuned out the words being spoken around you, zoning out and looking forward to your vital signs monitor. Your mind wandered to your last few thoughts in your previous reality, the desperation to come back, to see your estranged lover again. You couldn’t help but to feel disappointed, lamenting the fact that you’d found your way home, yet felt the ever present void in your heart where your Steve used to be.

“Y/N?” a voice asked you, and you glanced in its general direction. “What happened while you were out? What did you see? Did it work?” Bruce pelted you with questions.

“I don’t know if I’m ready to talk about it yet,” you sighed softly, bringing a hand up to your neck and rubbing it. “The watch worked though, I was definitely in other universes. I just couldn’t reach him. Bring him home. I failed.”

“Do you think he’s really out there?” Bruce whispered to Wanda hoping that you might not pick up on it.

“I’m… I don’t know. I just don’t know how likely it is that we’ll manage to find him,” she responded in a hushed tone. You bit back tears as she spoke, resuming your empty gaze on the pixelated green text of your heart rate on the monitor.

“I’m sorry, guys. I have to go back,” you interrupted. “I can’t give up on Steve yet. I know he wouldn’t give up on me.”

“Y/N, you could be gone for centuries before you find him, then return back here with no time passed at all, and possibly no Steve. You don’t deserve to take on all of that pain,” Wanda set a hand on your shoulder. “Steve would’ve wanted you to move on from him. To find happiness without him.”

“I can’t do that, Wanda. Without him I don’t even know who I am,” your voice trembled as you spoke. “He’s literally been my only tether through all of this.”

“I just don’t know that this is the best thing we could be doing. Sure, you’re physically fine, but it almost seems like you’re doing worse emotionally than you were before you left,” Bruce added.

“I’m not!” you sniffled before continuing. “I’m just tired from going to all those new places.”

Bruce and Wanda didn’t seem too convinced. “Don’t you guys believe in me? When have I let you down on a mission before? I’m gonna find him, okay? I’ll find him if it’s the last fucking thing I do,” you blubbered.

Wanda’s hand slid down your shoulder, and to the watch that was currently on your wrist.

“Don’t,” you uttered, swinging your opposite hand to grab onto your own wrist. You were aware that there was absolutely no way you could overpower her in taking the watch from you, but even in your minor hysterics, you were able to think fast enough to press the round button before the watch was able to be taken off of you.

You, and your wrist shook. Wrist shaking from the watch, and promise of sending you elsewhere, and you from a mixture of sobs and adrenaline. Though not the most ideal exit, it was an exit nonetheless.

You weren’t even sure if you cared that you were on good terms with your teammates anymore. 

You just needed to be with Steve again.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I promise next chapter will be happier.


End file.
